We live in a culture that condones sexually shaming ugly and/or disfigured people while it stands up immediately for the rights of the the visually appealing.If anyone dares to call a woman a slut, sexually assaults her in any way or even shows any unwanted attention, or society is quick to condemn them, AS IT SHOULD BE. It took our “civilized” society long enough to even get to the point where it realized that condemnation was necessary. But the aesthetically disadvantaged are constantly told that they are less of a man or woman because of the way they look. The girls are mocked by men and boys about how nobody would ever want to have sex with them (although they were minding their own business!), they are publicly shamed by men young or old screaming about how their tits and ass are not the right size or shape, told while they are minding their own business that they if they have any sexual experience then they must have been fucked by a dog because no human male would ever have sex with them, and they are laughed at by people just for walking down the street looking the way they do. People need to speak out against this when they see it happen,but they are too afraid to stick out and look “uncool”. Women target other women as well, by saying things like “Oh, I’m glad that I don’t look like HER” when they come across one who is not attractive. In fact, a lot of the reason male bullies get away with treating women badly is that they take advantage of many women’s desperation to look attractive to them,at any cost. Women don’t speak out against these guys or stand up for other women because they think they are better and more valuable than the “ugly” woman who is being attacked.Therefore, these women are guilty of perpetuating the mistreatment of women just as much as the men are. They think they are better than unattractive women because they judge their worth by how much men value them sexually,when really this value system is just a deeply flawed social construct that needs to change. It is a representation of the same sort of mentality of inequality that thought it was acceptable to call gay people “fags” when insults and discrimination against them were built into the culture that we lived in. The idea that a woman’s sexual attractiveness determines her value as a person isn’t true(and the fact that our society currently endorses it means the biggest socially approved put-down a woman can receive is to be called sexually unattractive, or ugly-yet another reason why people need to take this kind of sexual harassment just as seriously as the kind that happens to conventionally attractive people.) But is there really any woman out there who thinks that the most she can ever accomplish in life is to serve as a sperm receptacle? This appearance-based value system is a lie that is being perpetuated by the type of perverted, selfish men and boys who want to use women as nameless, faceless tools to satisfy their sexual desires. And it is being bought into by women with low self-esteem who are desperate enough to settle for being valued only for the appearance of their bodies, just so they can feel like they have any value at all. They reward men who objectify women and join in the discrimination against “ugly” women just so they can protect the social system that they feel 99% of their self-worth comes from. And when they do this, the unattractive continue to be bullied and oppressed in a way that is socially sanctioned, and attractive women bar themselves from ever fully realizing that they can do and be so much more than they ever could while confined by such a perspective on their own value. A world we can be proud of is one where we each take responsibility to ourselves and others by standing up to the men who verbally and sometimes physically abuse unattractive women so that future generations will not have to spend their whole lives trapped by a lie.
WHY DO COMPLIMENTS MAKE ME FEEL 2% BETTER BUT INSULTS MAKE ME FEEL 87% WORSE I DONT LIKE THAT
I was watching a video of an obese woman talking about wanting to lose weight. The woman in the video seemed frustrated, sad, a bit hopeless, & stressed. She talked about being bullied, used, dangerous dieting, drug use to lose weight, dysfunctional relationships, etc. I felt sorry for her because she didn’t seem happy. I figure she has a medical problem, lifestyle or know-how problem, or an emotional/mental health problem that’s stopping her from losing weight.
The comments said things like “she’s not even trying to lose weight” “your attempt to lose weight is pretty week” “this is disgusting” “what happened to personal accountability”. Those commentors, who are blaming the victim, who are very angry about something, so ready to pounce on the weight loss topic & show the world how superior they think they are to this woman, tell me “not only am I frustrated, sad, a bit hopeless, & very stressed - it’s to the point where I want to pull this woman down”.
Those commentors have more in common with the woman they are criticizing than they realize - but I feel sorry for those commentors, just like I feel sorry for the woman. Because I know if they felt good about themselves or maybe if they were less naive, they wouldn’t feel the need to put this woman down. I know they would listen to her & see her for what she is, which is someone who is sad & stressed out, who needs empathy more than criticism. They’re essentially bullying but calling it “guidance”. Confidence is silent & insecurities are loud after all. So good luck to the woman trying to lose weight, & good luck to those commentors who will surely need it - because one of the worst things is being so miserable, you need to try to make others feel miserable too.
I sometimes read twoxchromosomes subreddit (subreddit made for women) and the girls/women who are ranting the most are pretty. I’ve seen so many “I hate being attractive” threads where women write that people don’t take them seriously or they are constantly getting hit on or being catcalled. OHMYGOD, your life must be so difficult! Today I’ve seen a post about being pretty and smart and that this is a constant struggle. HOW? ON?EARTH? As an ugly woman I’m really pissed - of course I would rather have their “problems”. They’re like rich people problems - people don’t have money for food and billionaires they’re upset that their helicopter is too old.